Do you frequently over-schedule yourself and you go, go, go until you make a mess of something important, get sick, or have a meltdown with an accompanying temper tantrum or weeping session? Maybe you just over-estimate your ability to get everything done. (That’s pretty much the same thing, isn’t it?)
If you are not able to accurately self-assess, it’s likely you’re training your children in the same behavior. Sigh! I’m pretty sure that endless, unhappy cycle is not something we ever wanted to model for our kids.
Accurate self-assessment is clearly seeing and knowing one’s strengths and limits. For Christians, it’s balancing the truth of who we are in Christ with the honest understanding of our natural talents and shortcomings. When we use understanding and self-discipline to put boundaries on our obligations, we can create harmony between our time, energy, and tasks.
It’s a balancing act for us and for our children as well. We want to encourage their child-like faith to believe scripture when it says we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength (Philippians 4:13) while keeping them from jumping off the roof because they think their homemade parachute will actually work.
Training a child in EQ to recognize both their assets and their limits will help set them free from all sorts of trials and stress. And that’s a really good thing. Research has shown less stress keeps the immune system stronger so children get fewer illnesses such as colds and flu. (Gottman & Declaire, 1998)
But we need to start with ourselves. EQ can help.
Gottman, J. & Declaire, J. (1998). Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child. New York, NY:
Simon & Schuster).